I had never been to a Babies R Us before. Why would I? Unless you have kids, or know somebody having kids, you wouldn’t go. Let me tell you something. That place is both WONDERFUL and OVERWHELMING.
As first-time parents, we need everything. Unfortunately, I don’t have a clue what “everything” includes.
The good news, the fine people at Babies R Us have complied a list for us. To get it, all we had to do was open a registry. (This is a good time to mention that registering for my wedding was painful. Thankfully, Melissa did 99% of it. I would have rather ordered invitations a hundred times over than look at plates again. I’m still not sure why we needed plates with Christmas trees on them).
This was different. Once that zapper gun was handed over… I was unleashed!
I didn’t just scan, I scanned with flair! I pulled the zapper gun out of my imaginary holster like I was in the OK Corral. I did a 360-spin scan. I went through the legs. (Ok, I didn’t actually do that, but I will next time.) No baby product was going to escape the reach of my zapper’s red beam.
I scanned bottles, bibs, thermometers, Baby Bjorns, cradles, cribs, and some kind of steamer/sterilizer thing. I even scanned a Nintendo Wii. Why does a baby need a Nintendo Wii? Who cares? I just know my baby’s going to want one (and his or her daddy does too!).
In the end our first trip to Babies R Us turned out to be a lesson in gun control. Not the kind that makes NRA members shudder… but the kind where Melissa takes the zapper away from me.
If you want to buy our baby something (or me a Nintendo Wii) check out our registry at Babies R Us. It’s under Chechourka.
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